Today has been an interesting day. It is my 33rd birthday. And, as I try to do each year, I’ve spent it with my family. Earlier today we finished watching a mini-series on John Adams. While parts of it were a bit dull it was, overall, a very good show. It’s one of the few times my older two daughters have ever shown an interest in how our great nation came to be. It also got me to thinking about life and death. And, since it’s my birthday I feel it would be as good a day as any to wax on about such topics. Don’t expect any great wisdom here, just a bunch of rambling that may or may not be coherent. 
Depending on how long I live, I figure that somewhere between a third and a half of my is over now. For those who spent any time around me while I was a teen or in my 20’s, you no doubt heard me claim to be immortal a time or two. And I would always back it up with “I’m still here aren’t I?” as if the fact that I survived all that I have in life was proof that I couldn’t be killed. Of course I never seriously believed that I was immortal, but I always thought it would be ‘cool’ if I were. But as I get older (and hopefully wiser) I find myself unsure as to whether or not I’d want to live on this earth forever. And then I wonder why I even waste time pondering such choices when it’s clearly not a choice I can make. I have the days that God allows, no more.
Going back to that mini-series on John Adams. John sacrificed much in his quest to build a new nation. Going as far as to say (according to the mini-series) that all he wanted on his tombstone was “Here lies John Adams, who took upon himself the responsibility of Peace with France in the year 1800.” For the majority of his life he had this single minded devotion to one thing, to make the United States of America the best it could be. And he instilled that goal into his children.
Everything in life has a price. The price John Adams paid was many years away from his family, lost friendships and the making of many enemies. So, today in my moment of reflection I wonder, what will my legacy be and what price am I willing to pay? Over the years I’ve sacrificed much in an effort to build a business that I could pass down to my children. Thus far, all my attempts at such have failed. Today I wonder if the world of business is what I want to pass down anyway? Is that really the heritage that I want to leave them? In my opinion, it’s better than teaching them to work at a job they hate all their lives. But still, isn’t there more to life than just how we make a living?
I don’t have any great answers, but I do know this. When it’s my time to pass from this world I’d like to be able and look back and know that I made God proud. Whether it be by just raising the four beautiful daughters He’s given me or by becoming a missionary to the world or something in between. I want to look back and know that I’ve done all that He’s asked me to do. And no matter how many more years I have left, I hope they’re even more lively than the first 33. And, if time later shows that I’m only a fourth of the way through life, who am I to complain?